Sat 7 Feb, 5-8pm, Tottenham Green Leisure Centre, Philip Lane, Tottenham, London N15 4JA, £8 adv/£10 on door, www.londonrollergirls.com
What's more exciting than two teams of highly tough, highly trained, all-female roller skaters beating each other to a pulp in a game that's as brutal as it is tactical? When it's the deciding match to find out who'll go through to the finals of the London Rollergirls' first full season, of course!
Both the steampunk-styled Steam Rollers and the Clockwork Orange-themed Ultraviolent Femmes have lost a match to the mighty Suffra Jets. Now they're going head to head for a place against the Jets in the final, and they're both going to be fighting with all they have.
As usual, alongside all the action you can bring your own cans of beer (or drink of choice); stuff your faces with our legendary cupcakes; buy raffle tickets, t-shirts, stickers and badges; rock out to DJs playing music at the bout and get drunk with us at a free afterparty just down the road.
Uh… roller derby… remind me one more time…
It's an all-female sport played with two teams of four skating around a elliptical track, and one point-scorer (the "jammer") trying to battle her way past them all and lap them as many times as she can. The jammer gets one point for each opposing player she passes. You can't trip, grab or punch, but you can shove opposing players off the track using hips or shoulders, and try and knock them off balance.
And who are the London Rollergirls again?
The London Rollergirls are the oldest and best roller derby league in the UK. We're made up of three permanent teams (Suffra Jets, Ultraviolent Femmes and Steam Rollers) and an all-star travel team (London Brawling) that plays teams from other cities around the world. London Brawling is currently undefeated against Glasgow's Irn Bruisers, Team Canada and the Birmingham Blitz Derby Dames. We play to 500-capacity sell-out crowds at games (called "bouts") that also include DJs spinning rock, pop and punk; charity raffles; prizes; cupcakes; a fine merch stand and a riotous afterparty.
As a league we are always expanding, and we love training up brand new rollergirls and refs to join our ranks.
What else is happening in 2009?
25 April: Championship bout
6 June: London Brawling v Birmingham Blitz Derby Dames
– but the sailors praise the new boats